Lost

i really am.

dear God,is this really a test for me?cause if it is,i have a feeling i'm gonna fail terribly.i really don't know how i'm gonna get through this.i really don't.

college

is a never-ending nightmare.and its getting worse.please.i've wasted a year and a half.don't make it not worth anything.the times i've spent there.please don't do this to us.please.

i'm feeling the urge to cry a lot these days.especially after what mumy told me and asked me to do.i feel,i'm a huge dissapointment and a huge failure to them.my parents.

tell me what to do cause i really don't have a clue.none at all.yeah,i've got my license already but i still don't know where to drive to,besides,the road is getting foggier.

(its no time for jokes,but i just can't help it)and yeah,i passed my 2nd JPJ test.i wanna type on the smiley face but i'm just not in the mood to smile these days.

i.just.can't.take.this.test.

but God,gimme the strengh i need.gimme the will and faith.gimme the power to succeed.

i need a good long cry.but i'm soo tired i can't even sob.really really lost.this bump in the road has suddenly become a huge hill that seems impossible to overtake.

show me some signs.shed me some light.i'm walking like a blind person here God.and i'm sorry all i can do is complain.You must be tired of hearing me whine.

i'll try to do everything in my power.i'll do whatever i can.that i will.

and mumy,happy mother's day.

someday,i will make you proud.
someday,i will succeed.
someday,all this would be a thing of the past.

someday.....not now for sure.

xoxo,
enteng.