This one for her.

Been feeling really emotional this past few weeks. Many knows about my dear cousin Fiona getting surgery to remove a cyst from her ovary 2 weeks ago. But what's shocking is the state that she is in now.

It was suppose to be a very straightforward surgery. She wasn't suppose to end up semi-unconscious in the ICU. Breaks my heart to see the state that she is in right now. My pretty and petite sister, swollen all over and unable to move, more over eat. She hasn't eaten solid food in 2 weeks! *tears*

The doctors say it's not looking too bright. Her liver, her kidney and her intestines are all badly affected. But we refuse to stop believing in miracles, in God. She will come back, she will. No matter how long it takes, she will recover and resume her life.

She just got engaged a month ago! This was suppose to be the happiest moments of her life. And her poor fiance. Quitting his job to take care of her. What a test to face so early in the beginning of their engagement.

Please guys, pray for her recovery. She's too young. And it's really heart breaking to see someone seemingly healthy, suddenly being in a state like she is in right now. We love you Epy! God, bless her with all your love, let her overcome this. Please. *tears*

She's the one in green, Fiona Elisa Fredmond. Sooo pretty kan? *sobs*

But she looks like a completely different person now. Come back to us!

Simplicity at it's best!

So, I turned 21 today. Meh. Nothing special.

Although, I have to admit, when I had my 16th birthday, I swore I would have the awesomest 21st birthday party everrrrrrrrrrr!

But alas, time changed me and I no longer want a huge party with a Las Vegas theme.

Instead, it was probably the simplest birthday I have ever had. Just went to Keningau to have some pizza with the fams, bought my own cake, went home, had my grannies and gramp over, sang some birthday song and voila, sliced the cake and I was done with my birthday.

21 doesn't feel so special after all. If anything, age only comes with more pressure and the fear of not being able to make it in this world. The urge to quickly succeed in life, knowing that eventually I will learn to hate my work and wish that I had no work at all. Blergh. I'll face those messy situation someday.

For now, I'm enjoying life one day at a time.

Trying to make a very hard decision. What to eat?

Thanks cake. You were delicious!

June 17th 2012

So, today was one of those "hari ini dalam sejarah" moments for my hometown, Tambunan. Our current Prime Minister, Dato' Sri Haji Mohammad Najib bin Tun Haji Abdul Razak had a formal visit. Oh and he brought his wife and the gang.

The first Prime Minister to ever reach the Pedalaman area. So, despite all the shenanigans about his imperfectness as our leader, that has got to count for something, right?

I admit, the government we have now is FAR from perfect. Then again, which country has the perfect government? You tell me. I don't know.

But, what I do know is that, Malaysia is not a war torn, disease plagued country. And I am grateful and thankful for that. Our lives here is really much much much better than many other countries. So, why can't we just be thankful? Instead, some want more. MORE MORE.

Yes, some things could be better if it were reviewed and revised, but there are ways to let the government know that. Civil and educated ways.

I'm saying all these because today, instead of being happy that a leader was willing enough to leave the comforts of the city to be with us, even just for a few hours, some were content spewing words of hate and criticism. And I was embarrassed for them. Speaking with you butt hole is never cool. And never smart. Nobody is perfect. If you think you can lead a better Malaysia, go ahead, step forward and be the change that you wanna see. No one is stopping you.

Oh ya, and remember, nobody is perfect. We humans were built that way.

Count your blessings, before they run out.

Oh Crap.

Great. Think I stepped on dog poop when I started this week.

First week of the semester ain't goin so well. Bombarded with assignments and haven't begun any of em.

It's a hectic week. With baby Hazel Violet being born and all. I'm in aunty mode, not student mode, so it's a bit hard concentrating on college stuff right now.

Oh and a relative passed away. So many things happened this week, my mind is woozy. Even forgot to submit our folklore title to our English lecturer. Which was suppose to be today.

Doomed. Starting off with the wrong foot I tell you! And haven't even begun with my project!

New semester, new headaches.

Yeah so, first week of the new semester.

I have four subjects this semester, and one of em, Final Project, surely will blow my brains out. I foresee the dark ahead, with this one.

We have to choose one out of three concepts of PR management.

A)Help a company build up its reputation and identity.

B)Help revive a declining product.

C)Help solve a problem faced by the community.

C was a sure thing option for me. But after thinking for a few moment, now it seems like I'm going with A. Graah. I dunno really. All seems really hard.

I mean, its not some minor project that will be done for the college. Its for a third party! An official company. We have until 3rd of August to complete this project. I don't know HOW ON EARTH I will be able to pull this off.

God be with me!:(

Break my heart why don't you?

Here's a story.

Last Tuesday, me and lil sis Shany went to KK to show off the Beverly Hills apt that we're selling to a potential renter. It was a fruitless trip as the potential renter didn't have much potential after all. But that's not the story.

After that so called business transaction, we went to Megalong for some retail therapy. Mind you, my wallet was on the brink of emptiness. So, I vowed (snerk) to be extra careful with my spending. So for a while all I did was look around while my sis did all the shopping. (Annoying sister with a job and paychecks every month. grah)

As the story goes, we went into a small boutique. At first I was just going to look around, see all the pwetty bags I couldn't afford. Then, one of my biggest weakness appeared in front of me.

The shop was run by an elderly couple.

Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

The uncle was so so soooo excited when we entered. Even more so after I grab one of the bags on display. Lucky me it was on discount. Watching his hopeful expressions, I couldn't help but reach for my wallet.

And, his expression when I said I was going to buy the bag, was PRICELESS. Nearly killed me then and there. My sister noticed it too. Maybe due to our up bringing, we're all softies when it comes to the elderlies. He said thank you thank you and we left. Both shaken with, not sympathy, just.....pure sadness. To see that much enthusiasm over a RM28 bag, I was overwhelmed with emotions.

So much so that I urged lil sis to go back to the shop and buy something. A dress maybe. Haha. And she did. The uncle was shocked but he looked grateful, which was like another hammer hit to our hearts.

Back home, we didn't tell mum and dad. We'd be grilled to death. Spending money like we had our own bank. Maybe it's just a business stunt. Done to attract sympathy from buyers. But I don't care. I won' care. If it is that way, genius. Cause it worked on us.

I hope we at least helped that elderly couple a little. I really hope they get to enjoy the last years of their lives comfortably, not breaking their backs looking after a shop. That's what I would want for my grandparents.

Thankfully, it is what they are currently doing.

Anytime now!

So, my sister's water just broke. She's expected to give birth at dawn. Anytime now, and my niece will arrive! Gaaaaaaaaaah.

Words cannot describe how nervous and excited I am at the moment. FINALLY! With my holiday almost over, I was starting to worry that I might not be able to meet her before going back to the city.

Right now, I'm in the midst of making chicken soup for the mum-to-be. Again may I say GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

Double Six Tragedy

I am mentally slapping, kicking and bitching my self. For being an ignorant brat.

I've been alive for two decades and TODAY only I learn about this extremely important part of Sabah's history? Great job Teng. Been feeding off your state, not knowing its history. You should be proud. *clap clap*

So, for those of you who's in the same boat as me (a moment of silence for our ignorance), just finding out about this fact, on the 6th of June 1976, hence the name Double Six (still don't get it? June 6th is 06.06., so now you get it?) a plane coming in from Labuan, carrying then CM, Tun Fuad Stephens, Datuk Salleh Sulong, Datuk Peter Mojuntin, Chong Thien Vun, and Darius Binion, crashed in the sub-district of Sembulan in Kota Kinabalu.

Others who perished were Datuk Wahid Peter Andau, Dr. Syed Hussein Wafa, Isak Atan, Corporal Said Mohammad, Captain Gandhi Nathan and Tun Fuad's eldest son, Johari Stephens.

The cause of the crash is still a mystery, but I don't really wanna dwell too much on creepy government secrets that I'm better off not knowing. What I'm really sad for is, apart from my ignorance, the fact that the deaths of those leaders affected Sabah's history in more ways than one. What could have happened to us if Tun Fuad still lived until today? But that question, sadly, will remain unanswered. We can only imagine.

So, in memory of the lost souls, the 36th anniversary of the tragedy, and the confirmation of my absolutely incompetent egoistic self, I dedicate this humble post to the Double Six Tragedy.

Rest in Peace beautiful souls. The reason I am living in a peaceful Sabah today.

Keep it up Teng!

Okay so got my exam results already. Hehe.

I dunno how and what I did to be able to pull this off, studying last minute and what not, but thank the heavens God I got a pretty good one. Took 6 subjects last semester, and aside from Moral Studies that haven't been checked yet by my lecturer (since he's away at the moment, went for umrah), my other 5 subjects went well.

Don't really wanna brag about my A's and that one B+ I got for Community and Government Relations. Eh, did I just spill the beans there?*winkwink*

So far, still sittin comfortably on the dean list. A few more months to huff and puff all the way to graduation Teng! Then I can worry about my future and beg mumsy to let me stay in the house until I get myself a job. And work full time on finding miself that prince charming who is fashionably late. Or maybe he missed the train, and the next train will come in a million years? :)

New Hair! Again.

So, new hair lagi! This time, I can only go shorter since gettin extension is not an option for me. Gotta say, I feel rockin with this new style. I know I swore that I would never get rebonding treatment ever again, then again, I'm always up for a spontaneous spur of the moment decision. So, witness le before and after pictures!

This is the before, mumsy and pregger sis both had fun experimenting with my hair. 

I let them have all the fun they wanted.

Aaaaand the after. I had to ask Aunty Justina to save what ever was left of my hair. Damage control.

I think its liberating, hopefully people will not find it weird. But I think it makes my nose and cheeks look chubbier, no? But I like it! ;)

Harvesting.

Okay so this year's Kaamatan was quite memorable for me. Despite my protests and all the pouty mouth expressions I could think of, mumsy made us (me,shany and peny) accompany her dance troop from school for their show at KDCA. From my experience, me and 14 under age kids don't live in peace together. And boy was I in for a wild wild ride.

The main reason why I hate going to KDCA every year for Kaamatan is because, lets face it, the parking spots. Such a PAIN on my legs. Not forgetting the HEAT and the ENORMOUSLY LARGE amount of people. Graaaaaah!

Although things got quite frustrating for me sometimes, seeing how excited the kids, especially the ones who reached KK for the first time, my frustrations melted away like Popsicle on a sunny day.

We took them for dinner at Tanjung Aru. And the first thing that some of them did was DRINK the sea water. First timers, so cute! and heart breaking at the same time. They wanted to taste what it was like since they have never been to the beach. Break my heart? Definitely.

Sooooo, even though at first I was very very hesitant to go, in the end I felt like it was alright. The kids had fun and I actually had fun with them. But that doesn't mean I forgot how frustrating it was to handle them all at once!

Pictures!:)

That kid next to me is SUPER cute. Future hart breaker I tell you!

Halloooo Kuala Namadan tykes.

Looks like a pro don't I? I can't even put make up on my face properly :p

Hope you guys had fun!